Day253 Year2013

Mood:  Sleepy
Time:  2137hrs


It's night time.
I spend most of my hours connected through the internet as much as possible.
Mother has (tried) to detain us and despoil us of our only means of entertainment from this world.
The internet.

Can't blame her,though.
We HAVE overstayed our welcome from this world and we are expected to live adult lives.
Go outside.
Roam around.
Earn money.
Help with the family.
To put it simply, WORK!

It IS our fault in some way. We don't do our best and grovel for opportunities like a normal adult should be. We don't grab openings when there is one or even TRY. I think we were too sheltered from reality that now living the rest of the days inside a confined household is much better than going outside to "socialize" and be normal. We (siblings) were not normal from the start. Our kind of normal was the opposite from those around us. And because I don't want to be normal, that I chose to be the kind of abnormal human being I am now. Just much more depressed and suicidal.

I have tried to get a decent paying job.
But everywhere I go, its always BPO here, BPO there. Oh, BPO means Business Process Outsourcing or the famously Call Center line. Heck, I applied "frivolously" in the past. Even came to the point where I was handed some requirements and those LAST INTERVIEW, kind of shit. I didn't see it through to the end then and all I could come up as a reason was that I was still "studying". Yeah, I'm such an A**....

My point is, when I finished College, I immediately and hopefully looked for a job. I was so confident at my spoken and written English that I imagined myself getting hired after one application. So, imagine my disappointment when I heard from those fu*kng interviewers that the problem lies in my "ENGLISH". What the f*ck? Seriously??

So, yeah, I gave it some thought.
It was my first interview.
I was nervous.
Probably blabbered around about some shit or so.
And I applied again in some company.
And what now? You don't hire me because of my choice of Course in College??!
My spoken English was perfect. Great, even, and you disregard this fact in fear of dropping out of your company in just two years after working?!
What The F*ck!!?
Seriously?!
As if you think your current employees plan to stay there for even a year, you freak'g CUnT!
HONESTY my Fuc*ng ass...
Yes, you should avoid being TOO HONEST during interviews.
Those interviewers are too STUPID to recognize useful from useless with HONESTY in your character.

So, yeah.
Fu*k, people.
I've never been the same since.
Whether it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity or such.
I disregarded those things right away.
Also, I HATE sleeping in the morning and awake in the evening.
It's too bright and hot to sleep during the day and its too fuc*ng boring to do any work during the night. Graveshift hours is the most FU*cKED up schedule E-V-E-R !!

So, yeah, I complain a lot.
But its not you people who will be working there.
It's not your time you'll be wasting.
It won't be your fake smile you'll be faking around other people.
Hell, do you even know how tiring it is to smile around shitty people that talks behind your back that you want to punch, kick or even slaughter but can't?!
Yeah. It won't be you.
So Shut the FucK up!

*cough*
*cough*

To continue, life is just a piece of shitty thing.
Even those horoscopes won't be much use as everyday becomes an UNLUCKY DAY.
I want to continue with my profession but can't.
These fucking hospitals even make you take up an EXAM and push an insane number of requirements, just so you can work there as a VOLUNTEER.
What the fuck is that?
You'll be toiling, get lectured, be cleaning people's shits up; with the probability of being spat in the face, bitten by an enraged Rabies patient, get stabbed by an infected needle, be sued for malpractice and high chance of getting your license revoked with the most minute error and for what? A certificate for EXPERIENCE without so much as a fucking pay.

Ha-Ha!

What a laugh...

So what?
You chose to confine yourself within the comforts of home, waiting for time to pass by and hoping someday you get killed accidentally since you're such a weak suicidal maniac that you can't even take your pitiful life?

Um, yeah.
That sounds about right.

So, yeah.
Don't bug me about work.
I won't say it out loud, but well, there you go.
Read all about it!