Time: 0080hrs
The times of laughter and cheers are gone.
They are but a fleeting moment trapped in my memories; forever encased at the back of my mind.
I no longer have a reason to be happy. The people from my past are gone and the people I will meet in the future are heartless and cold. I HATE THEM. Try as I might to bring a smile out, in my heart I know that I am only kidding myself. I'm lying to my self again.
The nights are filled with passing time. Time is no longer important. I have no recollection of what I did yesterday that I didn't do today or won't happen tomorrow. Round and round it continues. This never-ending cycle of boredom, hatred and depression. I want to die but I'm not brave enough to face the pain that is incorporated with the separation of my being with my physical body. I am weak that way.
I no longer have anything to wish for. No matter how much I plead, wishes won't come true by simply praying to the Higher power. So I ignore trying to be what is written. I ignore being kind. I take people for granted and spread anger and hatred instead. This world doesn't care about me, so why should I? Even if I try to show kindness, the world only throws hatred at my face. Behind me there are kinds that stab me relentlessly. Everyone is a being full of envy and hatred.
At times when I do evil, I look here and there for some form of punishment but none comes back. I try to do good and I am faced with karma in an instant. This world never was fair to the good and more so gives a just example to the bad. You just live life as if there was no tomorrow regardless of how you live it. Every lives nowadays are running amok in a frenzy. The young die young and those that don't live at all die until they're really old and unhappy. Besides, who wants to live forever if you'll only experience bitter times at most? I hated this world. Even now I abhor the thought of being alive surrounded by lies,deceit,wrath,the madness of it all! I hate the people that whisper at my back. Talking about me as if they know me and what I've been through. I hate this world that speaks of peace and justice and never does practice it, or if they do only for the convenience of the wealthy. I hate the people that judge me and tell me they love me, because in the end they will be the ones who will hurt me the most. I hate you people.
"YOU" who come in here and read this and tell me things and shit that you don't really know about. You that will label me and such after reading this and You that will try to force your pitiful beliefs on me. For those people, I tell you now to STFU! Someone as dark and wounded as my freaking heart won't be able to understand the minds of idiots that claim the world is peaceful and kind. I hate this life!
